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Breaking up is hard to do

I am not a believer in public break ups, but sometimes you just need an outlet for the pain, a way to say goodbye and to release all the crazy thoughts swirling around inside your grief stricken brain. So with that in mind please bear with me as I say goodbye…

First off I need you to know that it isn’t you, it’s me, I have to move on because although what we have is truly special, I have other commitments which I need to fulfill, commitments which were there long before you and I ever got on this crazy roller coaster called love.

Of course you know that wouldn’t be enough to pull me away, you refuse to hear it, or don’t want to believe it, but the truth is you are just too good for me, you deserve better than I can give you. I’m just a boy from the wrong side of the tracks and you, well you’re an uptown girl making all the right moves. You are too special, too amazing to be hidden away for just one man, especially this man. The world needs to know you as well as I do, it needs hope and if I let you go, you can be that shining light which guides them through the darkness.

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I know it doesn’t seem fair and that despite our time together, despite living in each others pockets and excluding everything and everyone else from our amazing little world, it feels like the blink of an eye, like I was just getting to know you. Truthfully though you have so much to offer that even a thousand lifetimes would not be enough to leave me content. So maybe this is best.

I will take with me some of the fondest memories a man could hope for… Do you remember that time we slept in till noon, wrapped in goose down blankets with the sun trying to break through the curtains? Or the time we cranked up the fireplace and snuggled on the couch watching season after season of Sons of Anarchy while the snow came down in sheets outside the window? Or lying in the hot tub for hours watching the stars and eating ice cream?

So many memories to carry me through this terrible terrible time. I will never forget you or the long showers we used to take, the way I could push your buttons and have you light up all over still makes me giggle despite knowing I am losing you. I remember tinkering in the garage while you watched on silently, you thought I didn’t notice you, but I could barely focus on what I was doing, just knowing you were there.

Although it hurts now, I know you will be OK, I know you will find someone else to love you as much as I have. How could they not, there is so much to love. Two bedrooms one bathroom, a lounge, dining area, kitchen, garage and patio. And that’s not even mentioning all your nooks and crannies, all the bits and bobs that make you you.

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Yes I have to leave you, but know this, you have given this boy from the wrong side of the tracks enough memories to carry me through a lifetime. I knew it couldn’t last the first time I stepped through your dark wood doors, just a fool who thought he knew what the world was about. Now when I walk out, I will leave a man who has known true love, and true loss.

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Farewell Miss Amazing, I don’t regret a thing…

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